My father died recently, so I have been rather busy with other things. I wrote a short eulogy to him and I thought I would share it, and my memories of him, on my blog. I am not certain that this is the ‘done’ thing, but I am doing it anyway. I sort of feel the need to share it with those who are kind enough to read my blog.
My father was not a man who suffered fools gladly. In fact his favourite expression was BF, as in, bloody fool. We were all, at times, BFs. I am sure I was referred to as a BF on more occasions than I ever knew. Politicians were most certainly all BFs.
But beneath the façade of referring to everyone and most of their actions as those of a BF was a man who would, after he had finished his obligatory two minute rant, then do all that he possibly could to help someone out.
Crashed your car….you BF….then he would fix it. Needing help… he would invite foreign students into his house for the night. At heart he was, basically, a big softie. A velvet fist in a steel glove. He would forgive anyone anything – in the end.
I remember he used to sing a little song at times. At the time I never knew where it came from. Some of you may recognise it. It is incredibly rude, and incredibly sad. This is the chorus – which is the only bit I heard him sing.
It’s the same the whole world over,
It’s the poor that get the blame,
It’s the rich that get the pleasure,
Ain’t it all a bloody shame
This never seemed, to me, to be a favourite song of a man who did not care deeply about the world, and who would like to see it become a better place.
Yes he could be irascible – we all know that. Yes, he could be difficult and argumentative… and we all most certainly all know that. Yes, he too, he was a fully functioning BF at times, with bells and whistles, and there were most certainly moments when he drove me – and everyone else – completely mad. But my thoughts and memories now are almost entirely positive. As I think are those of everyone else gathered here.
As we know he did many, many things. A man of great energy and boundless enthusiasm for life. Whilst I was thinking about writing this short eulogy I remember a quote about Winston Churchill that I think best sums up my father.
“When you first meet him, you see all his faults. It takes a lifetime to appreciate his virtues.“